Thursday, 13 June 2013

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Curiosity Killed the Ditz #17: Why do we talk negativly to ourselves?


Why; the three little letters that haunt my existence. From the moment I could speak I always wanted to know why. Now as an adult I am finding less and less people that want to answer my questions. I have been called nosey or weird, and angered many a person, with just those 3 letters. This is my story, quest you could call it, to try and find answers to my Whys.

WHY DO WE TALK NEGATIVLY TO OURSELVES?

This is one that is difficult for me. I am notorious for berating and saying things to myself that I wouldn't say to my worst enemy. Part of it is my social anxiety disorder but the other part is just the way I am. Buy Why?

When I look at the different angles of this issue, various reasons come to mind.

1. I'm just being honest with myself
Now this is not true. If I was honest, then I would provide both sides of a situation, not just the negative. For some reason though our brains seem to focus on the negative first.

 2. I need an ego check
This is true. Sometimes, I get a bit full of myself and need to check my ego. Eh, what can you do when you are this great. JK

3. I bully myself instead of bulling others
This one is partially true. I learn from others and don't want to make the same mistakes. When I see them have an error in judgment (my opinion), I try not to follow. When I do, I get down on myself. Now, I could in the beginning, try to bully them into doing what I feel is right and avoid the situation but I don't want them to feel bad. I would rather take it all on myself.

Hmmmm, other than being a bit crazy, lol, I may have a point with all this. I don't think I am alone when I say I speak worse to myself than others. This needs to change. I have been working on some visualization or relaxation techniques that have helped. An example: Try to isolate muscle groups from your toes on up. Tighten the muscles and hold for 30 sec. This will distract your mind from the negative thoughts.

 Give that a try and let me know if it helps you. Also, I would love to hear if you struggle the same way I do. Us Negative Talkers need to stick together. 


Keep questioning.

Love,

DD

Twitter: @DitzWitDTits

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